If you browse on over to the Testimonial page of our website, you’ll notice many new Chakrubs owners gushing (pun intended) over their new ability to ejaculate or squirt. Crystals have the ability to magnify energy, so it makes sense that they would open us up to new, profoundly intense sexual experiences. While there’s no evidence that squirting provides a better or more intense orgasm, there can be a certain satisfaction in seeing proof of your hard work.
If there’s one thing sex therapists can agree upon, it’s that for women, arousal is very closely linked to our mental and emotional states. Men tend to be better at compartmentalizing, but women need to feel safe and relaxed in order to reach that edge. This is especially true for female ejaculation.
One of the biggest misconceptions about female ejaculation is that it’s urine. Female ejactulate is excreted through the urethra, but unlike urine, it originates from the Skene’s glands, which are located on the anterior vaginal wall in the same area as the g-spot. It’s no coincidence that the Skene’s Glands are often referred to as the “female prostate;” the fluid excreted from these glands is similar in composition to the fluid generated in males. Either way, if urinating during orgasm is a concern, use the restroom beforehand to give yourself peace of mind.
If you have any trepidation or nervousness around ejaculation, it might be best to first try practicing alone. If you’re practicing with a partner, they should be patient and ready to devote a significant amount of attention to your pleasure. Spend some time meditating on your goals, hopes, and fears for the session. Discuss them with your partner if you have one.
Now, the fun begins! Whether solo or partnered, if ejaculation is your goal, there should be plenty of foreplay. Make sure you’re plenty lubricated before you insert your Chakrub to ensure that there is no discomfort. If necessary, we recommend using coconut oil as a lube, although it should be noted that oil-based lubricants are not compatible with latex condoms.
If you’ve never squirted before and are unfamiliar with the sensation it could take a while to reach that point. You might want to begin with the clitoris and work your way in, so to speak. If you have a partner, they could begin by arousing you through oral sex. If you’re solo, try using your fingers to stimulate yourself. As you become more aroused, insert one finger and begin to slowly stroke your g-spot.
You can find your g-spot by inserting your finger about two inches deep, palm side up. It will have a spongy texture similar to roof of your mouth and is about one inch in size. Gently rub it while making a “Come hither” motion. If you have a partner, encourage them to do this while at the same time giving you oral sex. You and/or your partner will notice your g-spot enlarge as your arousal builds. That swelling indicates that the Skene’s Glands are filling the frontal wall of your vagina with liquid.
Don’t get discouraged if all of this activity causes you to have a “traditional” orgasm. That can often help you relax and increase your chances of squirting. At this point you or your partner’s hand may need a break, so it’s the perfect time to introduce your Chakrub. The curvature of the Rose Wand is particularly suited to g-spot stimulation. It’s also handy because it’s larger base makes it easy to grip while you keep your palm pressed against the clitoris. Keep a steady pace and rhythm as you or your partner moves the wand up and down. It will be this motion that sends you over the edge. You or your partner can also try pressing your other hand on your abdomen just below the belly button, which will put additional pressure on the g-spot and make it easier to squirt.
Many women describe the sensation of a squirting orgasm as similar to having to urinate. Self-consciousness often makes us hold back, but if you’re alone or with a reassuring partner, you can feel confident that it is your body’s way of signaling that it is approaching a powerful orgasm. As with so many things in life, you will have to let go of control in order to experience it fully. Remember to breathe and try not to tense up, instead letting the waves of pleasure wash over you.
Try not to be disappointed if you’re unable to squirt right away, remember that we’re all on individual journeys and that it will happen when the time is right. Consider whether there may be an emotional blockage and put your energy towards healing that. In the meantime, enjoy practicing!